January: Blue

Thanks to S at http://anofferingoflove.wordpress.com/  for hosting this color photography project  while having new born twins and the cutest toddler on the block! I am not a photography zealot by any means, although I did start out on a box camera of my dad's that took photos in rolls of eight, so you really had to pick your shots  because you only got eight at a time - a far cry from the digital age where you can quite happily snap 100s and not spend a penny on a print. I took these with Susan's six year old  Canon  Digital Rebel EOS. I repeat: I am not a photographer.  I wish I could figure out how to display them beautifully as our host  did but I don't have photo shop and it's late, so here we are.

We have blue and white "christmas lights" all around our living room. We haven't taken them down because they brighten our garden apartment up and Isobel loves them.

Ma "blues" - that's what me and S call our blue crocs!

Blue sideboard still life -  the tall patterned thing that looks like a drum is a percussion instrument that makes a sound  like a little thunder machine

Isobel chillaxin on the couch with one of her books. We read it to her last night. It's a really cute story and it's about Blueberries!!!

I think looking at these photos,  we could say it's a blue and yellow / white theme!
Enjoy!

Happy Three Month Birthday, Isobel!

Here are a few recent photos of Isobel which show just what a joy she is to us and how she completely beguiles us with her smiles.

I can't believe it has been such a long time since I posted. I hang out on all your blogs all day via my I Phone and comment when I can, but it's almost impossible to get time to type on a computer with both hands these days.

Now I have about 5 weeks of thoughts all jumbled up in my head and I am wondering what to write.

First of all, I am so happy that Isobel is three months! I don't want to wish the time away  fast but at the same time I really like the fact that she is growing and changing and getting bigger and stronger. She weighs about 11 lbs and a few ounces now and is about 22 inches long. She has learnt to suck on her fingers, to sit up and "dance" - which is really her rocking and rolling while sitting on our laps. In the last few weeks she started cooing and having all sorts of cute things to say. We took her to the church where Susan is doing her internship yesterday and she was a big hit. Especially when she started talking and then hiccuping very loudly during some deep quiet moment. I had to leave the sanctuary for a while with her and while we were gone, the minister prayed for Isobel's hiccups to go away. We got to sit at the front of the church for the children's moment - all these aremilestones which seem so surreal and exciting all at once.

She is pretty happy go lucky - which is a huge complement from yours truly. She is fun and likes to be out and about and experience new things and people. She does not like sleeping by herself and she  is definitely attached to Susan and me. She is not one of those babies that wants to hang by themselves a lot - if there are such babies! She likes to hang on her activity mat and chill for about ten minutes at a time and is starting to play with the toys that are dangling for short periods of time; she is not crazy about her bouncy chair; we spend a lot of time holding her which is of course the best. This week we hope to get a swing to vary her scenery a bit. I am still not able to put her in the moby wrap or Ergo with the infant insert. She hates it and I get upset and take her out immediately when she starts to cry.

We are so happy to see her smile and giggle and watch her eyes light up when she is feeling happy. Susan is the master ( or mistress) of gas relief and has some funny rhymes that she says while she is bouncing Isobel on her lap. The worst times for Isobel are around 5pm onwards when her gas seems to be really bad and she can't relax very much. She has got a really good pair of lungs!

Susan went back to work at the beginning of January after two months plus of blissful family leave and it's now just me and Isobel at home Monday to Friday during the day. We started going to a baby  and me group at a local child development center and I have been feverishly joining Meet Up groups and signing up for play-dates so we have something to do every day or so outside the house. So far we have one play date this week and I am working on some more. We also signed up for Infant Massage class and Baby Sign Language for next month. Apparently being a stay at home mother with an infant is not just about staying at home! Now I am getting to be a pro at driving with Isobel in my car and lugging her seat around I have a new appreciation for the whole drive through idea. I now know where the drive through Starbucks which is a big help to this decaf latte drinking mama.

I am going to close now and try to come back this week for short posts about things I actually think about and cogitate over, rather than this rather run of the mill list of what we are doing. I do actually have deep thoughts about life and mommyhood, it's just they are escaping me now.

EIght weeks of Isobel!

Yes, it's really me. I am really posting about life as a mum or should I say, life as mums.
I have been so bad at blogging about our little sweet-pea but I couldn't let her 8 week birthday go by without saying something!
There is so much to say and there are many posts in my head, but I fear I can't get it all down before she succumbs to hunger and mama milkies ( that's me) has to step in and offer a boob ( right now, actually!)

Here are some of the things that she has been doing. She has been smiling a bit more every day and today we got her on tape laughing and smiling. She is getting more and more visually tuned in and loves to gaze at the stars we have on our wall and the Christmas lights we have twinkling. Her hands are getting to her mouth more each day and we swear she will start sucking her thumb soon.
She has the cutest little yawn which we hope to get on tape on day - she opens her mouth wide and long and then at the end of it she blows out a huge puff of air that sounds like someone letting air out of a tire. Her legs are getting stronger and so is her neck. She's able to hold her head up more.

She had her first rotten cold aged two weeks and at that difficult time I  remember thinking to myself: "what were we thinking, having a baby? We haven't a clue what we are doing!!!" But we managed to get her to the pediatrician who told us we did the right thing by coming in and told us there was nothing to do but suck out her snot, make sure the air is humidified and keep her all cosy and warm. Thanks to  a family friend we discovered the great and amazing NoseFrida - which is a snot sucker way superrior to that bulb thing they give you at the hospital. You can get it from Wholefoods or  Google it - and now run to the store and get one now if your little one has a cold. It's amazing! I think I should take out stock in the company and start selling it to all my friends and neighbors.

Isobel is a sweet and easy baby most of the time -except between about 6pm - midnight when she gets gassy and upset.  Right now she is complaining bitterly as she sits with her Mommy who is very good at soothing her and much more creative than I am: I usually whip out my boob if she is upset.

One of the most interesting  and amazing things about being  a mum ( or Mama as is my designated title) is all the things that unfold that I never in  a million years thought about while TTC and being pregnant. The first shocker was the most moving moment when I called the pediatrician ( while still in the hospital) and told them I was calling about my daughter. My daughter!!! I don't think I had ever said those words before and it choked me up. Two very powerful words! And then spelling out her name - the name that we picked and the surname that we joined our names to make.
Powerful and moving stuff.

Isobel is crying for milk and i must sign off - with some pictures.

Claire, Isobel & Kitty relaxing on the couch about a month ago.

Just today, Isobel and Mommy Susan enjoy a bit of levity. She's smiling more and more each day!

Isobel and Claire, about a week ago. Isobel is grabbing Claire's finger.

This is actually the first smile we've caught on camera. Isobel is with her Aunt Lizzie.

Isobel at the pediatrician's office about 3 weeks ago.

Relaxing at home.

another death in the family

Ten days after the death of my mother, and four months after the death of his brother Oliver, our dear sweet dog, Dylan Thomas died yesterday after a long and happy life of 14yrs.
Dylan had been sick with a bad cough caused by an inoperable tumor in his lungs since the summer and had just last week started having seizures, which we think were related to metastases in his brain. We were hoping he would be around for a little longer as he was responding to medication to stop the seizures and to stem the cough and increase his appetite. But yesterday evening he had two seizures that he never came out of and Susan and her sister took him to the emergency vet while I stayed at home with Isobel and sobbed.  We knew when the seizures would not stop that this was the end for Dylan. I gave him a hug and a kiss as he was carried out the back door at about 11pm. Susan's sister sat in the back seat of the car with   Dylan on her lap  while Susan drove the few miles to the vets. They were both with him with when he died. Susan held his head as he died and told him we loved him.
Dylan was a wonderful companion for us and for his  brother Oliver and some of the things he loved the most were chasing his  Kong and running  crashing  into the waves of the lake, snuggling on the couch and the bed with us, chasing Oliver in circles around the beach and play fighting with him, eating cat food whenever he could sneak it, and rolling in the grass and on the sand. We are going to miss him so much and are lives are changed without him. We are grateful that he and Oliver were in our lives for some of the most wonderful years.

Dylan and Ollie as puppies

Dylan and Ollie are reunited again:)

my mum

My dear mum, Patricia Ann P*, died peacefully on  Tuesday November 17th, 2010, aged 73 in Yorkshire, England. She was a  teacher, lover of literature, antiquarian bookseller, writer, pacifist, animal rights campaigner, Quaker and lover of the Hebrides.  She fought a courageous fourteen year battle with Parkinson's disease and her tenacity and spirit were an inspiration to us. My brother Jonathan,who lives close to my mother and spent countless hours visiting her, tending to her and advocating for her care, spent the last three days singing and reading to her, sharing stories and memories as she rested peacefully. He was accompanied by his partner Chayley and son Murray in his vigil and he was able to be with my mum at the end. 

Mum died on Isobel's one month birthday, and we had just sent her photos of Isobel which my brother showed to her and placed around her room. We were hoping that my mum could  meet Isobel in the summer when we were planning to visit.

When my dad died on April 17th 2008 I didn't have this blog and I didn't have Facebook.  I sent out a mass email instead. This time I put it on Facebook and sent out an email. It was comforting to get so many responses from people who wrote words of love and support. Especially being far away from most of my small family.

In some ways infertility played into my not being there for my dad's death and my mum's too. We  put off visits starting in 2007 when we were starting out on TTC. When my dad died I had let my passport lapse and had to beg the British Embassy to expedite it for me - which they beautifully did - in a matter of days. The last time I saw my mum was in April / May 2008 when we went over for my dad's funeral. TTC and cycles and waiting got in the way of that kind of long distance travel. And the thought was, we were going to get pregnant any day and it would be much more fun to visit with a baby than with a bump.  I wanted to visit in May when I was in my second trimester  but didn't because of my general anxiety about the pregnancy. Now I am a US citizen but one who has still not applied for a passport - because - well I have been busy.  I know that I couldn't get a US passport in a hurry and I also don't want to travel with Isobel when she is so young and vulnerable to viruses and germs. She has had a cold for the past three weeks as it is.  The doctor said I could do it, although she is not advocating for it, but I just don't want to. And I need to apply for my passport.

We are going to go in August as originally planned and have a memorial service for mum then.  We are going on a family holiday to the Isle of Tiree with my brother and his family and my sister. We will scatter my mum and dad's ashes on the island, which was one of their very favorite places on earth. My brother is planning mum's funeral service which will take place at the crematorium in my home town and then at the Quaker meeting that my mum was a member of for almost 40 yrs.  The service is next week, on December 1st.

I have so much other stuff to say - about being a mum, a wife, adopting our daughter, post partum depression, breastfeeding, etc etc. It is so hard to find time to blog. I read blogs while I am breastfeeding or holding Isobel but it's hard to write on the I phone.

I leave you with some pics - of my mum and dad, and of their sweet grand-daughter Isobel.

My mum and dad, Pat and Harry on our favorite beach on the Isle of Tiree, Caolas

 

mum, reading  in one of her favorite places - her garden

Isobel waiting to see the pediatrician for her one month appointment

Isobel on the table at the pediatrician wearing her cousin Murray's baby grow!

Isobel in Pictures!

We're all doing well and there's so much to say, but I'm too tired. So for now, here are some pictures of our little Isobel. Enjoy!

Our little peanut!

Sneezy!

Sleepy

Pensive

Peek-a-boo!

Talk to the hands!

Introducing the REAL Newest Member of Our Family!

Welcome to the world Isobel Emily P-S!! Isobel arrived at 4:58 p.m. on 10/17/10 (this past Sunday) rather unexpectedly.  She weighed 5 lbs, 13 oz, and is 19 inches long.  Because she's so petite, everyone's calling her "Peanut." She's the talk of the nursery because she's so cute!

I had been feeling decreased fetal movement the day before and called my midwife, who told me to go in for a non-stress test around lunchtime Sunday.  Little did we know that we'd have a baby by 4:58 p.m.!  Because there was less fetal movement and the heart rate showed less activity, that a cesarean section was necessary. I was not dilated.  Everything pointed to the fact that she wasn't very happy inside anymore, and had to come out soon.

Susan was by my side all the time, and was a champion!  We're glad Isobel came out and didn't have to be in distress.  She's a good little breastfeeder and has a lot of courage.

We're completely in love with our little Isobel. She's gorgeous!  We can't believe we get to take her home!   I have since been diagnosed with pre-eclampsia, and was on magnesium for a day, and had high blood pressure, but it's being resolved.

We'll be at the hospital until Thursday and will be going home to some undone chores!